Friday, September 25, 2015

Being A Child

I never really thought of where my entertainment and products came from when I was little, I was reading Garfield and was remembering how I never thought of it as American, I miss that.

I'll Vote For The NDP Anyways

The current Federal NDP isn't socialist enough for my tastes, I still like them, I would just be more extreme.

I suppose that's why I am not a campaign manager, you can't just do anything when you are looking for votes.

Feel The Bern

I really agree that our political culture of mud slinging is wrong. People should be able to disagree on something and not just shout at each other, but actually discuss it in a civilized manner.

And all the sensationalist news picking on issues that aren't at the heart of political problems being faced is so evil.

Please Someone Explain

Why is everyone in Canada so obsessed with balancing the budget?

I am probably naïve, but can't the government just make money to spend.

I really mean obsessed, because to a point I understand it, we don't want devaluation of the currency and hyper-inflation. But they always talk about it and they don't really explain why it's so important.

There are other important issues you know?

Besides, tax the shit out of the wealthy, balance the budget, problem solved.

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

Identitities As Power

I have been a bit down on geek culture, but on the other hand I think that it is better than national identity, geekiness can be global, which is awesome.

Also it's more inclusive than other identities, like being a scientist, a proletariat, of a political affiliation, of a religion, or others.

Fucking Gamergate assholes! We don't want you here, everybody should be able to geek! I want to clockwork orange Star Trek to them.

Previous Post

I was in a bad mood when I made that post, I don't usually feel like I am nobody and that I will never achieve anything, besides, my disability has interfered with my ambitions as I have mentioned somewhat.

I'll try to give myself more of a break, but I think most of us get into bad moods.

Tuesday, September 22, 2015

Focus

I feel like my life never came into focus. I want it to, I feel like I exist beside society, that I am not really a part of it.

The thing is, I really have no idea what to do about it. I just lack that makes people make something of themselves, I have ambitions, but I don't seem to follow through with them.

Being a drifter/dreamer kinda blows.

I really admire people that are somebody, even if it's just any worker that helps make life good.

Friday, September 18, 2015

I Have Some Patriotic Tendencies

I am upset that German speaking countries aren't contributing massive amounts of culture and pop-culture to the world, unlike the United States. It makes me jealous.

I suppose a lot of people in various cultures are in that boat though.

I feel that it is one of my strangely conservative traits. I also don't want to see our culture drowned and replaced. Though I have heralded mono-culture as an agent of peace and stability, I don't think all distinctness should be lost if possible. Now that computer translation is making huge advances, we might not even need a global language, something I have supported in the past.

I like peace better though, so it takes priority. I just want have my cake and eat it!

And then there is our dismal birthrate...

Get off my lawn!

Wednesday, September 9, 2015

Rule Britannia

You know what? I feel sorry for the modern first world aristocracy, they are forced into a life of servitude to the state, I know they are well compensated for it, but isn't this a huge human rights violation?

I mean there is a lot of responsibility now for such leaders. It's not like the good old days, where being in the aristocracy was basically a free party. I know some of them party, but look at the headlines when that happens, being forced into public life seems awful to me.

Crowds

The thing I miss most often about living in Vienna is the constant availability of the masses, in Calgary you have to wait for festivals to go to big crowds. Due to Vienna's comparatively mild winters you can even find crowds in the old inner city in that season.

It feels good to get lost in the crowds and just be a part of humanity in such an obvious manner.

There is also the market and food culture. Though Calgary isn't entirely lacking in this area, it is not quite the same.

It's weird to be a market snob, since the elite would never bother with the marketplace. :D

There are other things I miss, but I am not sure that would be so interesting to list.

The thing I would miss the most about Calgary at this point though is my family/social life.

My Current Paranoid/Pronoid Musings

In the back of my head I still have reoccurring unsubstantiated thoughts:


I often feel that I am somehow different than others that makes me a notable human.

I think that there is a very disciplined Illuminati controlling the world.

I feel that I am observed at all times.

I think that people making my entertainment are intimately aware of me.

I feel that humans are somehow subconsciously telepathically interconnected, explaining how we function so well as a hive. Or that there is a hidden instinctual language that operates like telepathy at a subconscious level.

I think my Dad is watching me all the time.

I think that some of the people that I know died aren't actually dead.

I worry that I am awaiting a secret Illuminati trial.

I worry that we live in something akin to the matrix.

I think that my spending habits have an unseen influence beyond everyday economics.

I Have Been Feeling Nostalgic About Some Of My More Recent Breakdowns

Some of my more recent breakdowns were somewhat fun in retrospect, until I was lead off to the mental ward. The state of mind I was in was euphoric, everything had meaning, the tiniest of stimuli was a cornucopia of thought and sensation. I could stare at videogame screens with nothing but a simple animation and experience such wonders. It's obviously not healthy and the state of my living quarters was severely in disarray, but I wish I had access to such deepness of experience, my current state is so numb in comparison.

If I were disciplined enough I would try to go back onto oral medication and skip every once and a while, but my experience has been that I would not start taking the meds again when I started going loopy.

It's also numbed my libido somewhat, I remember being so enthralled by erotic imagery and almost being hypnotized, now it's all more of a robotic function.

It's my own natural high I suppose, it would be interesting to live in a controlled environment without meds, my own private living asylum. I was only ever suicidal when dealing with meds after all, so I probably wouldn't really be a harm to myself if I had people to look after me. I suppose being a mad monarch would be comparable. It's too much to ask to be sure, but it is an interesting thought.

Monday, September 7, 2015

Geekdom and Sci-Fi

I find that as an art-form, science-fiction has a lot to say intellectually. Maybe not all sci-fi can claim that it has expanded human knowledge, but some works have offered visions, commentary, and predictions which can be debated.

It still doesn't excuse being overly obsessed with it just because sci-fi is sci-fi and its being geeky. But it is I find a rewarding way to look at the world with new eyes and see perspectives that aren't found in the world today and history.

I wish it didn't have such a bad reputation as being immature, I suppose not all of it can be ground-breaking, there has to be room for shlock.

The European Union As A Prototype

I think European Integration under the E.U. is a good demonstration model on how a global federal state could be created.

I don't know if the E.U. will endure or crumble, but it has done some great pioneering work in making a supranational federation. And I think this is where the future should go when it comes to global governance. I do remember stating that I would like more regional autonomy to create participatory motivation, but there are some matters that would still require global governance, which areas those are exactly is too tricky a question to answer with a simple musing, but dealing with crises areas and situations would be a top thought.

The E.U. defines itself in one way as an institution that secures the peace in Europe by promoting cross-border market integration. I think this would translate globally quite well. It remains to be seen how well the new Eastern member states can be brought up to level of their Western counterparts through E.U. policy and leadership, but just because that might not go so well doesn't mean that an institution such as the E.U. can not be the vessel of such change.

Maybe the U.N. can still be transformed into a global federation.

Speaking Of The Immaturity Of Many People Again

It is a sickness of the first world for sure, but also, since I have been having such thoughts so late in my life I am wondering how much there is to the whole 30 is the new 20 thing.

People appear to be maturing later and sometimes not at all in affluent societies. I wonder if this should be fought in the educational system? I definitely think that the education system needs to be a priority when dealing with the next generation. But immaturity in adulthood, should it be a specific target?

I don't see the harm, we can always use a more a engaged and liberated population.

University Course

I am currently taking a Political Philosophy course at university.

I am definitely seeing the appeal of post-graduate work in a specific area of study. It is obvious that there is so much to cover in this one course that the material covered is not enough for mastery. And it would be great to be a well known commentator with a doctorate in just one sub-category of Political Science and make a name for myself.

This blog is already looking a bit different to me now, lot's of my thoughts were covered by thinkers I am reading about now and I was presenting them as my own thoughts. It is nice to know that there is a great history of likeminded individuals who struggle with the same subjects I do, though I had no doubt there were such people, it is nice to have a guide to the academic world's take on it all.

I am wondering, if I ever become an academic of note, if I will keep this blog as a reminder that I started out with a sloppy Journal of thoughts.

I noticed my blog is bordering on a thousand views, I am also wondering who finds it interesting in it's current state.

I have been thinking that it is a somewhat unprofessional work of musings. But as art at least I think it can be of interest.